Wednesday, December 10, 2008

Izatcho' ass?

There are a lot of stinky people out there. If you think about it, I'm pretty sure every group has a stinky model. So here's my list of common cliques, scenes, whatever.

-Stinky hippies. Yes, probably the most commonly known group of people that are known for smelling of dog shit. It's weird for them, though, because their reek doesn't seem to phase the general population. They still seem appealing to some people, I believe. For example, I overheard some people discussing which Grateful Dead bears they owned today. I left the room.

-Stinky rednecks. The clique that makes fun of every other clique and eventually seems to adapt their worst qualities. Some examples are: skinny jeans, mutton chops, and not bathing.

-Stinky kids. These are the kids that the Peanuts character Pigpen portrays. The ones that weren't told that bathing is an every day thing...or a thing that people should considering doing at all. Umm...some examples of what they do: smoke weed, listen to ICP, smoke lots of cigarettes, live in trailers, jump off of bridges, go to Frankfort, live across the train tracks in Keyser, don't shave their annoying facial hair, and wear the same shoes as me.

-Stinky models. As we all know, it's easier to style your hair if it hasn't been washed in a few months and armpit grease works better than any spray-on hair products.

-Stinky nerds (geeks, whatever). The kids that spend their time playing WOW and not bathing. The closest they come to washing themselves is spilling Monster energy drink on them and pissing themselves so that they don't lose their place when traveling in guilds, or whatever they're called.

-Stinky punks. Yes, another group that makes fun of a lot of other groups and is often known for hating hippies. However, there are those who still think it's not punk to wash yourself. The Leftover Crack fans (I can't remember what they call themselves. Could someone help me with this one? Are they Crusties?) I've heard in particular disapprove of bathing. Sounds like hippy ideology to me. (I do bathe, for the record, every other day.)

-Stinking Rastafarians. They just stink. Why? Because smoking weed is one of their cornerstones of their religion. It's like Jesus/smoking weed/dreadlocks/smelling bad. With a little bit of veganism thrown in.

-Stinky babies. Babies are the only clique that can get away with smelling like shit. Now, throw your tomatoes if you must and tell me that babies aren't a clique...but they're the worst of all of them! They're such a tight clique that they speak a language that only other babies can understand! What the fuck is that?! Clique.

That's all I have for today. Tried my best.


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